“Do you want to get well?”
Most people who know me do
not know about one of my biggest struggles. Two years ago, I was diagnosed with
fibromyalgia. It has been a great struggle, not just physically, but
emotionally and even spiritually. And, of course, struggling with something
that you do not understand increases the amount of the struggle.
This past week has been
one of the most difficult weeks yet. The physical pain has been almost
unbearable and, unfortunately, I am stubborn and hardheaded. Not being open and
honest about the struggle has, I am certain, made things worse, and harder,
than it had to be. I got very good at hiding pain. When it got really bad and I
couldn’t hide it any longer, then
people were shocked. So, here I am being open and honest.
And, originally, when I
wrote this post, I had developed various reasons why I decided that eliminating
processed foods from my diet for a period of thirty days was a good idea for
me. However, when I got to church this morning, the title of the message was, “Do
you want to get well?” Now, Pastor Ned was
talking in his message about spiritual health and healing the majority of the
time. But, as I am sitting there
listening to him it dawned on me. How much should this apply to my physical and
emotional health as well? After all, we are a temple of the Holy Spirit, right?
Some people will be
probably quick to tell me I am becoming a fanatic. I know some people who are,
but that is not what I am talking about here. Look, if I smoked cigarettes
every day or drank an excessive amount of alcohol every day or whatever other
drug you fill in the blank, and I knew that it was killing me (literally),
then, as a Christian, wouldn’t it be responsible and
Godly for me to eliminate that chemical from my body? My personal opinion is
that, yes. It would be. Well, I believe God was telling me this morning that
this is why I need to follow this path of getting myself healthy again. I’ve
done the research and read a ton of stuff, and everything I’ve
come across comes back to the chemicals I have put into my body. And, if I’m
honest, I’m addicted. Food has more
power in my life than it should and it is time for me, with God’s
help no doubt, to make some changes. Do I know for sure that I will be
completely “cured”
throughout this process? No. I hope so, and I am certain that it will make a
difference, but even if it doesn’t, I have no doubt that
this is a vital step towards health in my life. The rest I must leave up to God
and his wisdom.
I began 30 days of only
whole foods today, September 1 when I got out of bed. I’m
starting with 30 days as the goal so that hopefully it will remain an
achievable goal, and I won’t become overwhelmed. One
other hope is that this process will begin to undo any addictions to certain
things I have developed. I have already made it six weeks with no artificial
sweeteners (Yes, to those who know me well. That is six weeks with no diet
soda. At all.). Hopefully the next month will continue to clean up my life and
my body.
I am excited about this
journey but a bit anxious as well. And, I am not oblivious to the fact that
within a few days, the excitement is likely to wane greatly. I am hoping that
by posting this and by informing those closest to me, I will have high levels
of accountability and on the other side, things will be brighter, and less
painful.
Thank you for taking the
time to read!
Heather
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